It started out bright white, then impossible blue, then green and finally disappearing below the tree line as it changed to red/orange.
It was late at night, I was drunk, as usual, and I was taking my dogs out for the final time.
As was customary when I take out the dogs at night I join them, peeing as well. So as I stood there, cock in hand, peeing in the backyard, I was thinking about a girl I wanted to fuck when I saw it.
It took a few seconds for my alcohol addled brain to process the sight and I immediately thought first of the song ‘Stars Fell on Alabama’ which is Jacksonville State University, Marching Southerners signature piece, I had heard it a thousand times growing up on saturday nights during football season.
We lived close to the stadium in Jacksonville and you could always hear the strains of that tune carrying through the cool nighttime. I think I sang out loud. ‘Stars fell on Alabama…” as I peed a drunken figure 8 pattern into the bushes.
Then in a flash my drunken thought went straight to FALLING STAR!! make a wish!! So before I could stop myself wished out loud on the falling star that I would get a chance to fuck the girl I’d been contemplating.
Then almost as quickly, “shit!! Am I that shallow??”
Damn, even in my alcoholic daze I immediately regretted that wish. Pussy had been the ruin of my life, my addiction, my downfall. It was a large part of the reason for me drunkenly peeing in my front yard.
Why not wish for world peace, success of a loved one, money and fame or at least for salvation from wreck of my life. No I wished for pussy. Still an addict, nothing changes.
Zipping up, I sang again the memorable refrain, as I thought of innocent nights listening to the band’s fanfare as it drifted over my house…
I turned and calling the dogs, went back inside for another glass of vodka, thinking having wasted my wish on pussy, maybe it will come true!
©The Autobiography of Mr. Perfect, 2012, written entirely on my iPhone.